He's backkkkkk!!!!!!!!

Listen to me good, Justin Timberlake is back!

As a huge fan of N*SYNC and of his solo career (including movies) I am proud to say that Mr. Timberlake is back!

Ladies and Germs, I hope you have purchased your copy of The 20/20 Experience. Mr. Timberlake is not taking any prisoners on this one! As evidenced by a viral marketing campaign, Justin knew that he was missed 'round these parts. With only collaborations on singles to keep his fans at bay for the past 5+ years, new solo material was long overdue. Fans got their first dose of this material with the Jay-Z featured track Suit & Tie. I will openly admit, I was disappointed the first listen. Where was my Cry Me A River Justin? The My Love-Justin? The What Goes Around Comes Around-Justin? I was unexcited by the single, and even more-so saddened that I had held out hope for an amazing album.

But then came Mirrors.

Let me tell you, when I first heard this song, I wept a little. (Only a bit) It was just so sweet and touching of a song to his lady-love, and I felt every single harmony. The song itself was just the cap on a very exceptional, as it turns out album. Helping to signal this shift back to real music that I have been waiting on. To give you just a taste of his lastest masterpiece here is the video for Mirrors. Enjoy!

Hunkering Down

Everyone knows perfection is a myth, but only few can claim that they don't actually strive for perfection.

I am not one of those few. 

I'm not going to lie, PGSD family, I strive for perfection. I do so in every aspect of life. Especially when it comes to work.

A job is one of those places in life, where if you work hard enough to prove yourself, you are rewarded handsomely with recognition, promotions, raises etc. So naturally I come into everyday at work ready to knock someone's socks off. One of the few things I will allow myself to brag about is that I am a hard worker. I have worked hard for everything I have in this life. I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth, my parents don't have connections in my field, I just have me and what I can prove. 

I've done a lot in the way of my career in the short span of 2 years. I have a job I really like, and it affords me some very rich opportunities. Opportunities, people laughed at to my face when I said I was going to get out of my first real job when I was applying. Anyways, this is my place to shine. I clock in everyday by 8:30am and sometimes don't clock out until 1 or 2 am. I work my butt off for my company, and it hasn't gone unrecognized. However, it is that false strife for perfection that will get you caught up no matter how many 16-hr days are worked. 

Recently I learned I made a mistake, the scale of which I don't even know yet, but it was pretty major in my book. Since the mistake was caught over the weekend, I tossed and turned for the better part of a whole night, and just prayed to get some rest until the morning when I have some semblance of a chance to correct it. 

I thought all night about just turning in my resignation, and poof being done with it, and that's when I realized my problem. I don't see myself as human. 

As a human being, I will make mistakes, I will get things wrong, and mess up sometimes. It just comes with the territory. However, whenever I have fallen in this false pursuit of perfection, it makes me want to run.I only see two ways out of imperfect situations, run like mad or hunker down and face the music. 

The running is away from failure, from not being that perfect person, but what I realized is when you run, you don't learn how to deal with imperfections or failures. You constantly set yourself up for situations where you miss that growing experience. I promised myself a while ago not to run from imperfection, it can only make you stronger. So I chose now to hunker down. Be prepared for the worst, but hope for the best. In the end you may just be pleasantly surprised. 

If I Could Change Anything About My "Adult" Self...

I struggle with how much I should reveal to people. And no, I’m nobody special. I’m not a celebrity or the president, or anyone with a story that people would really be interested in.  But I still struggle with how much I should divulge when I’m forming relationships. I used to think that I had a social issue. I researched it and everything. I talked to my doctor. And we both (read: my doctor) surmised that I was a perfectly “normal” social girl. Good news: I wasn’t predestined to be a serial killer. But I still can’t seem to make sense out my natural inclination to hold back things from people. Of course, at some level, there are issues with trust. But why is it that some people can be such open books, and I can’t? I really realized it when I formed friendships in graduate school and saw how easily everyone opened up to me. Although it’s never been rare for people to open up to me, I was taken aback by how easily these grown adults could speak so freely about themselves. I don’t claim to have low self-esteem. So I know that’s not it. But I wish I knew how to open up more. And more importantly, I wish I knew the right people to whom I could open up. I’ve often run into scenarios where people I tell things to use them against me in later conversations. My personal information has been used as a source of comedy, a way of furthering a petty argument, and a communally shared story. Of course, it wasn’t anything that was super serious or personal, nothing that made me feel very vulnerable, but still its effect was lasting.

I thought blogging would remedy this somehow. In my mind, starting a blog would be a kind of antidote for my tendency to hold things in. In reality, it’s made speaking about what’s really going on, the embarrassments, fears, and the like, even more difficult. Sure, everything I’ve written has been my truth, but I hold back. I spend too much time reworking sentences so that they relay a message that’s a more watered-down version of what’s really happening. It’s weird. But I think that blogging, writing for the public in general, is the greatest way of challenging myself to drop my inhibitions. As I get deeper into my adulthood, I’m beginning to see everything as a sign or symbol for something deeper. And what I’m learning, at least what I think I am learning, is that this one change could open the door for many other things. I have big dreams and if I can conquer not bottling things in and being a little less guarded with myself, it’ll make way for the fruition of my dreams.

Or maybe it’s not that deep at all.

Stay tuned.

Unexpected Finds

So in my internet browsing I stumbled across this hilarious and informative website ThugKitchen.com The author is a healthy living home cook who attempts to make vegan eating a tad more "gangsta". The author states that he is not vegan but that he believes we should enjoy a more natural diet to ensure a long life free of preventable health problems such as high blood pressure and diabetes.  He gives recipes and tips for healthy eating  in a hilarious yet interesting way. Imagine Suge Knight explaining why swiss chard is great for your blood sugar levels or how tomatoes can prevent testicular cancer. In his own words:

“what is thug kitchen?”

THIS SITE IS HERE TO HELP YOUR NARROW DIETARY MINDED ASS EXPLORE SOME FUCKING OPTIONS SO THAT YOU CAN LOOK AND FEEL LIKE A FUCKING CHAMP.

Stay away if you are squeamish about strong language or not interested in changing your lifestyle. This is a great laugh and informative. 

Healthy Snacks.

What is your favorite healthy snack?

My favorite healthy snack is actually really simple and inexpensive. It doesn’t take much effort. It requires no real machinery or expert chef’s utensils. All you need is a toaster (or something that toasts) and a butter knife. My favorite healthy snack is wheat toast with peanut butter and a sprinkle of cinnamon on top. It’s filling, quick and simple. I like snacks that have a good amount of fiber because it helps to keep me from feeling sluggish, and peanuts are a good source of fiber. In fact, nuts in general are. When I couple that snack with a really good cup of tea, I feel like I’m almost in heaven.

I need to keep a snack with me to keep my energy levels and blood sugar in control. I am a sweets lover so typically I like to grab greek yogurt, fruit, and honey. I like to boil fresh fruit and a little raw sugar or sugar substitute and throw it on top of my yogurt. I also enjoy fresh fruit and honey or just honey on top of my yogurt. It satisfies my sweet tooth with eating an overly sugary snack that will eventually cause me to crash. The trickiest part of this is finding the right brand for you. I went through some pretty bad ones before I settled on Fage. 

When I was 17 I went to Italy for the first time. My host mom was the most adorable woman ever, and she was constantly fixing me food. It was literally stuffed at all times, but the one thing she made for me that was genuinely my favorite was her fruit salad. This fruit salad is probably the simplest recipe, but it is so delicious and fresh at the same time. All you have to do is chop up  some strawberries and bananas into a bowl. Sprinkle with a little lemon juice and just a dash of  sugar and shake. Viola the simplest fruit salad, yet also the freshest. This simple recipe is great for lunch breaks or even a breakfast treat. It is very filling. Hope you enjoy!

I'm not really into elaborate snacks. I like to keep it simple so I can grab and go. Most of the time the purpose of my snack is so I am able to have the chewing sensation fulfilled so I usually just grab a hand full of almonds. If I have time or am actually hungry I like to slice up a banana and dip them into a tablespoon of peanut butter. If I want to add some crunch to that I will break up a graham cracker as well and dip that into the peanut better. Both snacks are easy enough that I wont look else where to satisfy my needs at that moment. 

Thank You and You're Welcome.

Say what you want about Mr. Kanye West but you can not doubt his talent (and not just musically). I've loved Kanye since Through the Wire. Even til this day I enjoy everything about him including his rants. Why? Because he is who I want to be. I want to be able to speak my mind without fear. We are very similar. Our egos were created Shaq size just like our hearts. Before you stop reading this in order to avoid a Kanye obsession post, I would like to let you know its really not about that. I am writing this to explain how awesome his book Thank You and You're Welcome is. Another life lessons book that's short and very relatable to anyone.

First off, this book is a graphics artists giant slice of cake. The typefaces of the sayings are purposefully created. Kanye West is an artist and it shows with everything he does. The book itself is a small 53 page read filled with what West describes as "personal proverbs" and stories of lessons learned.

"Thank You and You're Welcome" is to describe moments where "both parties give and both parties gain". I read this book often when things don't seem to be going right. There's a page in the book for pretty much everything. My favorite page is "I wonder...would you rather have 100% from an average person or 10% fm someone who is outstanding?". 

You're trying too hard to dislike this man if you find something bad to say about this book. 


BTW...If you haven't got your laugh for the day, here it is (There's no way I can explain this though)

Thank You & You're Welcome.

Law and Order

So I absolutely love true crime story and history. Combine the two and I am in heaven. That's why I suggest you read Gangster Squad: Covert Cops, the Mob, and the Battle for Los Angeles by Paul Lieberman. I discovered this book after seeing the movie which was beyond amazing. 

Mickey Cohen was one of the most powerful mobsters in Los Angeles in the 1940s and 50s. I became interested in the Los Angeles mobster scene after seeing L.A. Confidential and Devil in a Blue Dress when I was about ten years old. Cohen was the head of the West Coast Outfit after seeing the potential there. Because he was Jewish he was considered an outsider by the mostly Italian crime families in Chicago and New York. No one had ventured far enough west so Cohen claimed it as his own. Combine a drive to succeed with being a murderous sociopath you have a man who was able to take over a city.

Because Cohen was so powerful he was able to take over an entire city and have most of the law enforcement on his payroll. The cops, chief, and majority of judges were receiving kick backs from the mobster and turned a blind eye to his racketeering, money laundering, prostitution houses, illegal casinos, and murders. The Gangster Squad was an off the record team formed to take down Cohen. They did not follow the rules and stepped way outside of their jurisdiction to stop the most notorious gangster in the west. 

This story explores the personal lives of the men who spent a large part of their careers trying to bring down a single man who destroyed an entire city. Its not a happy story, but it is incredibly interesting. The author is able to step into the personal lives of these real people and how their work which at the time they could not be acknowledged for changed police work and showed that there were still people dedicated to justice. 

It is much more detailed than the movie which takes a lot of artistic licenses so read the book...and always pay your taxes because you know....that's one thing you can always definitely go to jail for. 

Did I do that?

Have you ever been doing something typical in your daily routine and notice you do something that isn't quite "typical"? For example I write a lot, whether for the blog or just to write out my thoughts. I noticed the other day that when I spell specific words I do it to a song it may have been in. For instance, "bananas"...I can not spell that word without doing it to the the beat of Gwen Stefani's songs Hollaback Girl. Then there's "independent", in my head it is required that I spell it out the same way Webbie does in Indepedent. I have no idea how long this has been going on but I can assume its around the same time the songs came out. 

Just to refresh your memory...

Who knows what other bad habits I've picked up but I hope when it comes time for me to have children I will be over this. Do you have any bad habits that took you a while to even notice? Let us know. 

I wasn't there.

Being who I am, it is rare that I will have enough patience to complete a long book unless it is read in one sitting. I read roughly three to five books at a time and seldom make it to the end of any of them. Due to the fact that this is such a big trend for me I find books that will interest me the most. Fiction is a rare read. I tend to be drawn to non-fiction, specifically (auto)biographies and inspirational books that are a bit quirky. 

Christmas 2011 I was in an independent bookstore with my brother in DC and came across This is Water by David Foster Wallace. I wrote it down with an intent to buy and read it when I had time. Spring 2012 during the end of my final senior year I decided it was time to add it to my collection of reads that were already in rotation. It immediately drew me in on the first page. Within less than a week I was done and reread it immediately because its not like I had any other books to read. (Pure sarcasm if you didn't catch that) 

This is Water is Wallace's 2005 commencement speech to the graduating class at Kenyon College. He begins with a story where an old fish asks two young fish "How's the water". The young fish reply with "What the hell is water?". Deep right? (No pun intended) Wallace explains that the story isn't for him to be that wise old fish to explain life but to merely point out that the most obvious of things are the hardest to see and talk about. The speech goes on to discuss the cliches of commencement speeches, teaching you how to think and how insulting that can be. He tells more short didactic stories that draw you in and make you wonder where is this man going. In the end you realize with the help of Mr. Wallace of course, that life is your real education, your "job of a lifetime". 

I reread this book in hopes that I could create my own graduation memory. Graduation day arrived and I looked around and realized I didn't have a relationship with anyone so when it was time to go though the "remember when" segment of the ceremony I zoned out. Then the speaker began his speech and I focused on him for one or two minutes hoping he would be as amazing as David Foster Wallace. Nope, didn't happen. I zoned out once again. By the end of the whole ceremony I had recreated a graduation ceremony that I would have actually enjoyed. So when I passed a group of graduates discussing what they thought was interesting about what the speaker had said, in my mind i was thinking "I don't remember that". Instead what I remembered was that when I walked across that stage my job of a lifetime was beginning and no degree can prepare me for what I was to start learning. 

Sometimes we have to make our own experiences in order to learn more than what we can receive from any random memory someone else attempts to create for us. 

Did You Know...

Did you know that there's an easy way to let us know what you're thinking? SImply look for the gold box on the right side of the page and tell us what you think anonymously. We love feedback! 

PGSD

How to admit your lessons.

Sitting and looking through old pictures and friends a la Facebook and your mind starts churning through thoughts and memories. Lately a subject my fellow PGSD ladies and I have covered is upbringing. How different rules and values shaped us into who we are today. So naturally, it is easy to think back to Little B.

I went for a therapeutic jog this past weekend, and I am thinking back to the rules I had growing up. How I couldn't drink my juice prior to finishing my meal, how I had to be home by 6pm or else my mother was calling the cops, or how my chores had to be done, and grades on par before even asking for anything. I got an allowance, and was taught how to save, and make your money stretch. Also reminded daily that everything you do shouldn't be for the all-mighty dollar. You need to just do for other people, just to be there for your fellow man. Not only is this a blessing to another, but you will be richly rewarded with the experience. 

I used to feel like my adolescence was too controlled. I didn't live in a household where it was okay to talk back to or question your parents. I did whatever I was told without question, and did it wonderfully. There were times I tried to rebel, sure! But me being me, I would always end up doing the right thing. (Or telling a half-truth as I became known for in HS with my parents) My parent's goal was to raise a well-rounded, worldly, educated individual.

When  I got to college and finally spread my wings, I was mad at my parents. I didn't know freedom was that wonderful and exhilarating. I wanted to keep my freedom and not have to answer to anyone, so I made sure in college I was as self-sufficient as my education would allow me to be. At one point, I had three paying jobs and an internship. Granted at times it was very difficult, but that taste of freedom was beyond great and I haven't given it up since.  

Looking around at all my friends, and folks our same age, I see a lot of people stepping out on their own for the first time post graduation. Some don't know how to pay a utility bill, or even write a check. Some don't even have a passport, nor a desire to ever have one. These are things I have been doing since high school. I personally equate the ability to hold your head above water with independence. Sure we all need help sometimes, self included, but if you constantly have to have someone figure out your life for you? You need to sit back and re-evaluate some things honey.

 I find I often times have no patience for people who don't desire independence. You don't have a ride somewhere? CTA is $3. You don't have a know how to file your taxes? Turbotax and H & R Block have an app for that. Do not let your lack of knowledge, know-how, or circumstances hinder you from being great. Get up and do something about it. 

I thank my parents now. I see so many adults nowadays that struggle so much with the basics of the world. My curfews taught me consequences, my allowances were my money management lessons, my restrictions taught me the resourcefulness and responsibility of being an adult.

The world is moving in a different direction from the standards of our parents. Children as a whole are being brought up in an era that is much different and as unexpected as anyone can imagine. In this muck of confusion, I am grateful to have the foundation of my upbringing that has helped to shape me in the person I am today. I have finally become adult enough to realize some things were done for my benefit, and to this day, I can admit I carry those lessons with me daily. 

Since Reality TV has been slacking, pick up a book...

I love to read, and I’ve read a lot of books in my time (the latter part of that sentence makes me sound old). I have a love of fiction, but I don’t shy away from a good self-help/spiritual/inspirational  or history book. However, more often than not, I gravitate towards fiction.

One of the best books I’ve read recently is called Room by Emma Donoghue. Without revealing too much of its plot, the story centers on a woman who has been held captive for years and the child that she conceives during her captivity. What makes this story remarkable, in my opinion, is that it is told from the point of view of Jack, the five-year-old little boy who has only known life to be inclusive of that small space. By having Jack be the novel’s sole point of view, the reader is not forced to read scenes of the sexual and physical abuse that we know his mother, Ma, is subjected to at the hands of Old Nick. Donoghue really forces the reader to rely on their common sense and imaginations. Room is an engrossing novel that you will find yourself getting through easily and quickly because of its innocent and accessible language and style. When I finished reading it, I looked at the world a little bit differently. It changed my perception of space, and I realized that every space, no matter what tragedy or happy time is associated with it, is meaningful. I appreciated my experiences more because I realized that Jack and Ma were not just characters, but people who actually existed. After all, Donoghue’s inspiration for writing this novel was the Fritzl case, where a woman in Austria was held captive by her father for 24 years. During this time, she endured physical and sexual abuse at his hands and bore seven of his children.  The case made Donoghue pose the question: What would it be like for a child to grow up without ever having been outside? From this question, Room was born.

Emma Donoghue is an awesome writer. You can tell she really got elbow and knee-deep into her research for this book because she was truly invested in exploring the answer to this question, and many more I'm sure she came across during her research. Everyone that I've recommended this book to have been pleasantly surprised by it. My most macho male friends even admitted to shedding a tear or two at moments. 

Definitely a must read!

http://www.roomthebook.com/

There's nothing like a new toy!

No matter how old you get there is still that same excitement when you get something new. This week I got a Nutri-Bullet. I was so excited to try it out and now I have to admit that I can't stop using it. It's so simple and fast that I juice daily in order to try out new recipes. I go shopping specifically to buy new fruits and veggies to try. Green juices are currently my favorite. The one pictured below is spinach, romaine, 1 granny smith apple, 1 banana, and a few almonds. Yummy!

Rumor has it that green juice helps clear your skin (I will let you all know if I notice any benefits like that as I continue my daily green juice breakfast). I have noticed that it does provide a great morning pick me up. My energy in the morning is through the roof and I love it!

Top 5 Beauty Must Haves

Hey PGSD, what are your beauty must-haves?

It hardly ever takes me a very long time to get ready for the day. As long as I've got these essentials, I'm ready in a flash and feeling like a million bucks!

1. Cherry or Strawberry Chapstick

It’s not just about the flavor. Although I do love the flavors, I like those for the day because they have a tint to them so they add a bit of color to my lips when I don’t want to wear lipstick, or it’s inappropriate to wear lipstick. I wear Spearmint Chapstick to bed.

2. Palmers Cocoa Butter

I love the smell of cocoa butter and it works wonders for my face. Especially in the winter time.

3. CoverGirl Queen Collection: Mascara in dark brown or black and Loose Powder

I don’t use it just on my eyelashes. It’s handy for filling in my eyebrows, since I have the tendency to occasionally pull at my eyebrows when I’m anxious. I don't usually wear foundation and concealer on a regular day, but I love a light dusting of loose powder from the Queen Collection. It covers and keeps my face feeling light.

4. St. Ives Apricot Scrub

I adore this stuff. Even though I try not to use scrubs everyday, St. Ives is so gentle that it can be used daily without drying out my skin. It makes my face feels ahhh-mazing! Soft like petals.

5. Wen Haircare Products in Fig

You may have seen infomercials for Wen Haircare, the hair system that has shampoo, conditioner, leave-in conditioner and detangler all in one. I am obsessed with what this stuff does for my hair. I actually look forward to washing my hair. It’s great for everybody’s hair too. It makes your hair shiny, soft, manageable and smelling fresh! There are a wide variety of scents like, Sweet Almond, Winter Vanilla, Lavender, and Pomegranate. But my favorite has to be Fig. I like feeling it tingle my scalp when I use it as a deep conditioner. When I don't wash my hair, I use the styling gel every day and I love it. Try Wen! You'll love the results you get and the time you save on styling your mane!

The beauty section of my bathroom is insane. I collect products like a fiend and have a wide variety of products and price points. I'm obsessed with trying new things ,but have a few constant go- to items:

1. Natural oils- Be it almond, coconut, castor, or jojoba I love my all natural oils. They are harmless and can be used for hair or skin without being too heavy. I use a combination on my face and hair and wonder how I survived without them before my discovery. 

2. E.L.F clear brow and lash mascara- This keeps my brows in check and makes sure they are free from stray hairs in between trips to the threader. This is a miracle in a bottle and all for $1

3. C.O. Bigelow lip balms- I absolutely love the variety of flavors and they keep my lips moisturized for long stretches of time. It tastes great and comes in a variety of flavors without worrying about being tinted or a full on color. I'm not a super big lipstick wearer so I love the colorless shine.

4. Mascara- I adore all Maybelline mascaras as well as Dior, Big Girl, and Buxom. Even if I don't have a stitch of makeup anywhere else on my face I will have mascara. No lashes needed. 

5.  Dove bodywashes are A- mazing. I have super sensitive skin and these products lack lanolin which can be irritating for those with skin problems such as eczema  The variety of scents and textures are sure to please everyone.

I’m a fairly simple girl when it comes to beauty products but the things that I do have are things I live by. 

1. There isn’t a day that can go buy without my Clinique 3-step skin care. That consists of a facial soap, clarifying lotion (which is alcohol based cleanser), and a moisturizing lotion. A clear face makes life so much easier.

2. Next on my must have list is cherry Chap Stick. It stays in my wallet. I’m not worried about color or shine. I just need moisturized lips.

3. Smelly goods! I have an everyday scent and a ooh la la scent. I am obsessed with my brown sugar body spray (also body butter and lotion). The sweet scent is addictive. My ooh la la scent would be my flower bomb. Its slight sweet but spring like. It makes me happy.

4. I’m just starting to get in to make up but my two goto’s have always been foundation and mascara. My favorite foundation is Make Up For Ever Professional Paris HD Invisible Cover Foundation. I stumbled upon it in Sephora a few years back and have been hooked ever since. There’s nothing like finding your perfect color and lightweight foundation in one.

5. As for the mascara, I’m an advertisers dream! Maybelline’s volume express mascara commercial reeled me in and continues to do so. I am currently carrying around the Mega Plus Volume Express, only because I still have a couple of tubes to finish but I do plan on moving to the newer one, The Rocket.

So there you have it. My top 5 beauty must haves.

You know that phrase, 'many hands make light work'? Well imagine these products as my extra 'hands'. Here are some items I must have at all times:

1. Coconut Oil-This is top on my list. Used as a moisturizer, this oil really helps to ward off ash and dry skin. I make sure to buy the unrefined, virgin coconut oil. It is all natural and keeps your skin so silky smooth.

2. Benefit 'They're Real' Mascara- I have negative eyelashes. They are naturally short, and whispy. However, after 2 coats of this miracle mascara, I have the most amazingly full lashes. Absolute best mascara I have ever used.

3. Vitamins- This one is a personal one as no one should undertake anything without consulting with a physician. Legal fun aside, I have to have my vitamins everyday. Does this make me old? No. What it does is give me great hair, nails, skin and amazing energy. I have to have my vitamins. Period.

4. MAC Studio Fix Foundation- This is the best cream foundation I've ever had in life. It covers flaws and gives me a great glow. It always keeps me camera ready.

5. Green Tea- I wake up every morning before work to have a large mug of green tea. It gives me great energy and puts a smile on my face in the morning. I would definitely recommend this for anyone looking for an alternative to Coffee or energy drinks. It is all natural and doesn't give you that crashy feeling in the middle of the day.

What are some of your daily must-haves?!