Sitting and looking through old pictures and friends a la Facebook and your mind starts churning through thoughts and memories. Lately a subject my fellow PGSD ladies and I have covered is upbringing. How different rules and values shaped us into who we are today. So naturally, it is easy to think back to Little B.
I went for a therapeutic jog this past weekend, and I am thinking back to the rules I had growing up. How I couldn't drink my juice prior to finishing my meal, how I had to be home by 6pm or else my mother was calling the cops, or how my chores had to be done, and grades on par before even asking for anything. I got an allowance, and was taught how to save, and make your money stretch. Also reminded daily that everything you do shouldn't be for the all-mighty dollar. You need to just do for other people, just to be there for your fellow man. Not only is this a blessing to another, but you will be richly rewarded with the experience.
I used to feel like my adolescence was too controlled. I didn't live in a household where it was okay to talk back to or question your parents. I did whatever I was told without question, and did it wonderfully. There were times I tried to rebel, sure! But me being me, I would always end up doing the right thing. (Or telling a half-truth as I became known for in HS with my parents) My parent's goal was to raise a well-rounded, worldly, educated individual.
When I got to college and finally spread my wings, I was mad at my parents. I didn't know freedom was that wonderful and exhilarating. I wanted to keep my freedom and not have to answer to anyone, so I made sure in college I was as self-sufficient as my education would allow me to be. At one point, I had three paying jobs and an internship. Granted at times it was very difficult, but that taste of freedom was beyond great and I haven't given it up since.
Looking around at all my friends, and folks our same age, I see a lot of people stepping out on their own for the first time post graduation. Some don't know how to pay a utility bill, or even write a check. Some don't even have a passport, nor a desire to ever have one. These are things I have been doing since high school. I personally equate the ability to hold your head above water with independence. Sure we all need help sometimes, self included, but if you constantly have to have someone figure out your life for you? You need to sit back and re-evaluate some things honey.
I find I often times have no patience for people who don't desire independence. You don't have a ride somewhere? CTA is $3. You don't have a know how to file your taxes? Turbotax and H & R Block have an app for that. Do not let your lack of knowledge, know-how, or circumstances hinder you from being great. Get up and do something about it.
I thank my parents now. I see so many adults nowadays that struggle so much with the basics of the world. My curfews taught me consequences, my allowances were my money management lessons, my restrictions taught me the resourcefulness and responsibility of being an adult.
The world is moving in a different direction from the standards of our parents. Children as a whole are being brought up in an era that is much different and as unexpected as anyone can imagine. In this muck of confusion, I am grateful to have the foundation of my upbringing that has helped to shape me in the person I am today. I have finally become adult enough to realize some things were done for my benefit, and to this day, I can admit I carry those lessons with me daily.
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