I am not one of those few.
I'm not going to lie, PGSD family, I strive for perfection. I do so in every aspect of life. Especially when it comes to work.
A job is one of those places in life, where if you work hard enough to prove yourself, you are rewarded handsomely with recognition, promotions, raises etc. So naturally I come into everyday at work ready to knock someone's socks off. One of the few things I will allow myself to brag about is that I am a hard worker. I have worked hard for everything I have in this life. I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth, my parents don't have connections in my field, I just have me and what I can prove.
I've done a lot in the way of my career in the short span of 2 years. I have a job I really like, and it affords me some very rich opportunities. Opportunities, people laughed at to my face when I said I was going to get out of my first real job when I was applying. Anyways, this is my place to shine. I clock in everyday by 8:30am and sometimes don't clock out until 1 or 2 am. I work my butt off for my company, and it hasn't gone unrecognized. However, it is that false strife for perfection that will get you caught up no matter how many 16-hr days are worked.
Recently I learned I made a mistake, the scale of which I don't even know yet, but it was pretty major in my book. Since the mistake was caught over the weekend, I tossed and turned for the better part of a whole night, and just prayed to get some rest until the morning when I have some semblance of a chance to correct it.
I thought all night about just turning in my resignation, and poof being done with it, and that's when I realized my problem. I don't see myself as human.
As a human being, I will make mistakes, I will get things wrong, and mess up sometimes. It just comes with the territory. However, whenever I have fallen in this false pursuit of perfection, it makes me want to run.I only see two ways out of imperfect situations, run like mad or hunker down and face the music.
The running is away from failure, from not being that perfect person, but what I realized is when you run, you don't learn how to deal with imperfections or failures. You constantly set yourself up for situations where you miss that growing experience. I promised myself a while ago not to run from imperfection, it can only make you stronger. So I chose now to hunker down. Be prepared for the worst, but hope for the best. In the end you may just be pleasantly surprised.
Very inspiring, mistakes are just opportunities for growth in disguise. I struggle with making mistakes too. I find that it's a good thing if people take the time out to tell you what you're doing that could be better than they give up on you and do it themselves. It will all work out in the end.
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